Tikka To Ride

Red DwarfHaving survived a near-fatal encounter with their future selves, the crew of Starbug are faced with a far more serious scenario – the curry and lager stocks have been destroyed. Unable to come to terms with his grief, Lister is compelled to sabotage Kryten and reclaim the Time Drive. His plan? To pop back in time to an Indian take-away and order 500 curries. Unfortunately, the time device is a little bit rusty. Instead of depositing them within chomping distance of a chicken vindaloo, the wayward device places them in a certain book store depository in Dallas, on “the day that American King was shot.” After knocking Lee Harvey Oswald out the window, our intrepid curry-seekers inadvertently change history and prevent JFK’s assassination. To evade responsibility for Oswald’s demise, the Time Drive is once again activated and takes them to Dallas, 1966. The Starbug crew’s intervention in the natural flow of history has left America barren and deserted. With time enough to take stock of their situation, the foursome deduce that they must return back in time to intervene in their own intervention (obviously).

Season 7 Regular Cast: Chris Barrie (Rimmer), Craig Charles (Lister), Chloe Annett (Kochanski), Danny John-Jules (Cat), Robert Llewellyn (Kryten)

Order the DVDswritten by Doug Naylor
directed by Ed Bye
music by Howard Goodall

Guest Cast: Michael J. Shannon (John F. Kennedy), Toby Aspin (Lee Harvey Oswald), Peter Gaitens (FBI Agent), Peter Ashe (Cop)

LogBook entry by Mark Stevens

Stoke Me A Clipper

Red DwarfFresh from his latest round of heroic deeds, Ace Rimmer returns from the past, on a mission to find his counterpart on Starbug. Ace just isn’t the same Ace anyone remembers – in fact, Ace is now a hard-light hologram, having replaced the original Ace. The funny thing about all those heroics is that they seem to lead to a high death rate. And “Ace” is here to recruit Red Dwarf’s own resident smeghead as the universe’s next hero. But “Ace” can’t finish Rimmer’s training before his own light bee powers down for the last time.

The universe is in a hell of a lot of trouble.

Order the DVDswritten by Paul Alexander & Doug Naylor
directed by Ed Bye
music by Howard Goodall

Red DwarfGuest Cast: Brian Cox (The King), Ken Morley (Captain Voorhese), Sarah Alexander (Queen), John Thompson (Good Knight), Alison Senior (Princess Bonjella), Mark Carlisle (Lieutenant), Mark Lingwood (Gestapo Officer), Kai Maurer (Soldier), Stephan Grothgar (Soldier), Andy Gell (Soldier), Alison (Voorhese’s crocodile)

LogBook entry by Earl Green

Ooroboros

Red DwarfCat spots something which may be either a wiggly thing or a swirly thing, but is actually an unstable interdimensional rift not unlike a swirly thing, and in engineering a linkway opens up to another dimension (rather like a wiggly thing). Lister, Cat and Kryten meet their counterparts from another dimension, a dimension in which things happened a little differently – Kristine Kochanski, not Lister, was put in stasis and revived three million years later; and Lister, not Rimmer, was revived as a hologram to keep her sane. But a ship full of angry GELFs (quite ugly things) attacks, leaving Kochanski marooned in an unfamilar universe with a familiar but unsavory crew, one of whom also happens to be the salvation of humanity.

Order the DVDswritten by Doug Naylor
directed by Ed Bye
music by Howard Goodall

Guest Cast: Gary Bleasdale (Frank), Juliet Griffiths (Barmaid), Adrienne Posta (Flight Announcer), Alexander John-Jules (baby Lister)

LogBook entry by Earl Green

Duct Soup

Red DwarfA sleepless night on Starbug is made even worse when a generator failure leaves the ship dead in space (with just enough momentum to carry it on an uncontrolled dive toward a rather large star). The only way to get to the backup systems is an arduous trek through the ship’s duct system, facing such hazards as drying cycles and the backwash from urine recyc. Lister suffers from claustrophobia in the tiny crawlways – well, actually, to be honest, they’re not all that tiny. And worse yet, the crew discover that this calamity has been engineered by a force which isn’t so much sinister as it is simply paranoid…

Order the DVDswritten by Doug Naylor
directed by Ed Bye
music by Howard Goodall

Guest Cast: two uncredited GELFs

LogBook entry by Earl Green

Blue

Red DwarfLister’s overconfidence in flying the ship results in his almost destroying Starbug by driving through the tail of a comet, which for some reason leaves his fellow crewmembers rather upset. Perhaps it’s the general smegginess of the situation, perhaps it’s the atypical rush of bravado, or maybe it’s just insanity, but one visit to the supply room and one very disturbing dream later, Lister misses Rimmer. Fortunately, Kryten thinks he can help cure Lister of his loneliness, whether it takes hypnosis…or worse!

Order the DVDswritten by Kim Fuller & Doug Naylor
directed by Ed Bye
music by Howard Goodall

Guest Cast: none

Original title: Heartache

LogBook entry by Earl Green

Beyond A Joke

Red DwarfKryten prepares a sumptuous dinner in celebration of the anniversary of the day Lister and Rimmer rescued him from the Nova 5. Kochanski derails his plans with a group vacation to a Jane Austen artificial reality program. Kryten ensures that her plan tanks, so to speak, and forces the others to join him for dinner – but Kryten ends up dining on ashes, for two reasons. The first reason is that no one seems particularly grateful to have been led to the dinner table at gunpoint, and the second – and rather more important – reason is that Kryten’s head explodes at the sheer ingratitude of his comrades. His spare heads also blow when Lister tries to repair him. Kryten’s only hope exists in the form of another 4000-series mechanoid named Able, a decrepit old droid who has been reduced to an electronic zombie by a secret which will be revealed to Kryten when he is reactivated.

Order the DVDswritten by Robert Llewellyn & Doug Naylor
directed by Ed Bye
music by Howard Goodall

Guest Cast: Robert Llewellyn (Able), Don Henderson (Simulant), Vicky Ogden (Mrs. Bennet), Alina Proctor (Jane Bennett), Catherine Harvey (Kitty Bennet), Sophia Thierens (Lydia Bennet), Rebecca Katz (Mary Bennet), Julia Lloyd (Elizabeth Bennet)

LogBook entry by Earl Green

Epideme

Red DwarfKochanski spots a large chunk of ice in space, containing the long-dead Jupiter Mining Corporation supply ship Leviathan. The entire crew, as it happens, is dead – with the singular exception of a former Red Dwarf crewmember frozen in a block of ice. Once brought aboard Starbug, however, the mysteriously preserved human turns out to be a walking cadaver infected with a 100% fatal intelligent virus called Epideme – which is quickly passed along to Lister when his new visitor can’t keep her hands off him. Kochanski and Kryten take extreme measures to chase Epideme out of Lister’s body, but instead of boosting his immune system, they disarm him instead.

Order the DVDswritten by Paul Alexander & Doug Naylor
directed by Ed Bye
music by Howard Goodall

Guest Cast: Nicky Leatherbarrow (Caroline Carmen), Gary Martin (Epideme)

LogBook entry by Earl Green

Nanarchy

Red DwarfLeft to deal with the universe single-handedly, Lister is having a bit of trouble adjusting, and Kryten has to restrain himself from doing everything for him. Kochanski suggests using Kryten’s supply of internal self-repair nanobots to perform reconstructive surgery on Lister, but Kryten’s nanobots mutnied a long time ago. If the nanobots could be found, they could rearrange matter on the atomic level, but the last time Kryten remembers having them was on the mission to investigate the S.S.S. Esperanto hundreds of years ago – which also happens to be when the crew lost track of Red Dwarf.

These events are all linked, but not in a way that any of them can imagine.

Order the DVDswritten by Paul Alexander, James Hendrie & Doug Naylor
directed by Ed Bye
music by Howard Goodall

Guest Cast: Norman Lovett (Holly)

LogBook entry by Earl Green