Experiment K08: Gamera Vs. Guiron

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The KTMA SeasonMST3K Story: Joel and the Bots are hopeful that they won’t get another Gamera movie, but the Mads counter that turtles are going to be “big, really big”. Still, at first it seems like Joel will get his wish, since the Mads have run out of Gamera films. They briefly contemplate sending a good movie like Star Wars or Jaws, but Dr. Erhardt finds Gamera vs. Guiron at the last moment. At a break, Gypsy accidentally drops a piece of heavy equipment on Crow and he dreams that he is on Earth in the Mads’ control room and that the Mads are stuck on the “Satellite of Loathe”. In his dream, Crow has been sending them Planet Of The Apes Christmas over and over again. Joel wakes Crow up just as they go to commercial. This incident leads Joel and the Bots to an extended discussion on the nature of dreams. After singing a snippet of Satellite of Love with the Bots at the episode’s end, Joel announces that “Kent” is doing a survey back on Earth and that next week there won’t be another Gamera movie.

Gamera Vs. Guiron Story: Akio, a Japanese boy, spots a space ship through his telescope and observes it landing at the park. Akio, his friend Tom and sister Tomoko go out in search of the ship and find it. Akio and Tom climb aboard and the ship launches, carrying them into space. Gamera attempts to stop them, but the ship accelerates too fast. Back on Earth, Tomoko tries to get help, but none of the adults believe her story except one policeman. The boys eventually land on an alien planet where they witness a furious battle between a “Space-Gaos” and a monster whose razor-sharp snout slices the Space-Gaos to pieces. Running from the monster, Akio and Tom find themselves inside an alien city where they meet two female aliens, Belladonna and Flovera. They explain that they control the monster and that it is called Guiron. They also say they need to leave the planet and that they want to take the boys back to Earth with them. Their true intentions are revealed when they drug Akio and Tom and state that they will use the boys as food. Gamera finally arrives and is initially defeated by Guiron, falling onto his back on the bottom of the ocean. The boys find out about the aliens’ plan and eventually escape and revive Gamera. With the boys’ help, Gamera defeats Guiron in a battle that also leads to the aliens’ death. Gamera then takes the boys back to their families on Earth.

MST3K segments written by Joel Hodgson, Trace Beaulieu, Josh Weinstein, Jim Mallon & Kevin Murphy
MST3K segments directed by Vince Rodriguez
Gamera Vs. Guiron written by Nisan Takahashi (as Fumi Takahashi)
Gamera Vs. Guiron directed by Noriaki Yuasa
Gamera Vs. Guiron music by Shunsuke Kikuchi

MST3K Guest Cast: none

Gamera Vs. Guiron Cast: Nobuhiro Kazima (Akio), Miyuki Akiyama (Tomoko), Christopher Murphy (Tom), Yuko Hamada (Kuniko), Eiji Funakoshi (Dr. Shiga), Kon Omura (Officer Kondo), Reiko Kasahara (Flovera), Edith Hanson (Elsa, Tom’s mother)

LogBook entry by Philip R. Frey Continue reading

Loud As A Whisper

Star Trek: The Next GenerationStardate 42477.2: The Enterprise is forbidden to interfere in negotiations to be conducted by their passenger, the deaf, mute mediator Riva, who seems more interested in Counselor Troi than in seriously bringing two warring factions together. It is only when his Greek-like Chorus, a vital element in his task since they translate his thoughts into speech, is destroyed by a trigger-happy alien that Riva truly worries about the task he must accomplish.

Order the DVDswritten by Jacqueline Zambrano
directed by Larry Shaw
music by Ron Jones

Guest Cast: Diana Muldaur (Dr. Pulaski), Marnie Mosiman, Thomas Oglesby, Leo Damian (The Chorus), Howie Seago (Riva), Colm Meaney (Transporter Chief), Richard Lavin (Warrior #1), Chip Heller (Warrior #2), John Garrett (Lieutenant)

LogBook entry by Earl Green

Experiment K09: Phase IV

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The KTMA SeasonMST3K Story: The Mads are in trouble. Their boss, “Old Leadbottom”, has found out they’ve been embezzling money for their experiment on Joel. To make matters worse, they’ve spent their grant money on customizing the Mad Scientist-mobile. They need $40,000 to bring Joel back, so they sold his car. Joel tells them he had $40,000 in it all along, so they send him “the ant movie” as punishment. Joel takes the opportunity of a break to teach the Bots the “Three Robotic Laws”, but they don’t take them seriously, stating the third law is “Give a hoot, don’t pollute.” Later, Joel and the Bots discuss what they’re going to do when they get back to Earth. A game of “I Spy” concludes with an impromptu a cappella rendition of “Wipe Out”. After the movie, Joel announces that they are looking into creating a fan club and asks people who are interested to call in. Joel ends the broadcast by having Crow and Gypsy recite the “Fourth Robotic Law”, which he wrote himself: “Don’t be surprised if somewhere, sometime, when you least expect it, someone walks up to you and says ‘Don’t be surprised if somewhere, sometime, when you least expect it, someone walks up to you and says “Don’t be surprised…”‘”

Phase IV Story: A mysterious solar phenomenon has caused odd behavior amongst the world’s ant population. James Lesko, a specialist in game theory, joins Dr. Ernest D. Hobbs in investigating the ants’ activities. Hobbs had found that ants had been engaging in a high level of socialization: meeting and planning, even across species. The scientists operate in a biosphere outside a housing development that had been overrun by the ants. The only people in the area are a farmer named Eldridge, his wife Mildred, granddaughter Kendra and hired hand Clete. Once they have settled in, Hobbs and Lesko find that the ants have built tall towers, a clear indication of their advanced intelligence. The scientists attempt to contact the ants, with Hobbs finally resorting to destroying their towers to rile them. The ants respond by destroying the scientists’ generator. The Eldridge family has also been run off of their farm. Fleeing to the scientists’ camp, they are caught in a barrage of poison sent by Hobbs to stop the ants. The only survivor is Kendra. Once rescued, Kendra upsets an experiment Hobbs is performing on some of the ants, resulting in Hobbs being bitten and the ants getting a sample of the scientist’s poison. The ants, now immune, step up their attacks: disabling the biosphere’s communications and heating it to the point where the computers fail. The poison from the bite causes Hobbs to become increasingly erratic. He hatches a plan to defeat the ants by destroying their Queen. Meanwhile, Lesko uses geometry to communicate with the ants and reaches the conclusion that the ants want one of them. Kendra, thinking it’s she the ants are after, runs away, giving herself over to the ants. Hobbs tries to go after the Queen himself, but the ants have dug a trap for him and he succumbs. Lesko, with no options left, tries to execute Hobbs’ plan. Eventually, he finds what he believes to be the Queen’s lair, only to discover Kendra: safe, but altered. He comes to the realization that it was the two of them the ants wanted all along. The world belongs to the ants now and mankind will be taught its place.

MST3K segments written by Joel Hodgson, Trace Beaulieu, Josh Weinstein, Jim Mallon & Kevin Murphy
MST3K segments directed by Vince Rodriguez
Phase IV written by Mayo Simon
Phase IV directed by Saul Bass
Phase IV music by Brian Gascoigne

MST3K Guest Cast: none

Phase IV Cast: Nigel Davenport (Hobbs), Michael Murphy (Lesko), Lynne Frederick (Kendra), Alan Gifford (Mr. Eldridge), Robert Henderson (Clete), Helen Horton (Mildred)

LogBook entry by Philip R. Frey Continue reading

Experiment K10: Cosmic Princess

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The KTMA SeasonMST3K Story: Hoping to watch the Super Bowl, the Mads decide to send the movie (which is just two episodes of Space: 1999 stitched together) using an auxiliary transmitter they bought with the profits from the sale of “No-D” glasses. Later, Crow gives Joel a haircut and they engage in typical barbershop chit-chat. At a break, Crow cons Servo into testing the theory of evolution by trying to fly. Servo crashes, causing a disagreement between the Bots that lasts for some time. Crow and Servo begin to do Joel’s taxes, but are upset to learn that they are “business expenses”. When the movie finally ends, Joel, Gypsy and Crow play a little catch, culminating in Joel singing a horribly off-key rendition of “We Are The Champions” and the Bots getting into a tickle fight.

Cosmic Princess Story: A prologue tells us that in the year 1999, the moon was blasted out of its orbit around the Earth and hurtled off into space. Its only inhabitants, the crew of Moonbase Alpha, struggle for survival against terrible odds. First, the “Alphans” confront Mentor, an alien who is attempting to revitalize his dead planet Psychon by using the psychic energy of aliens who wander near. He captures an Alphan exploratory ship, feeding one of the crew’s minds into his “biological computer”, Psyche. Then he captures Moonbase Alpha’s leader, Commander John Koenig, along with Medical Officer Dr. Helen Russell and astronaut Alan Carter. Mentor plans to use the remaining Alphans to complete his goal. Mentor’s shape-shifting daughter Maya is unaware of the deadly affects of “helping” Mentor, believing her father’s methods to be benign. Koenig is able to convince her of the truth, allowing him to escape and defeat Mentor. With the destruction of his world imminent, Mentor pleads with Koenig to take Maya to safety. Later, Koenig and crew member Tony Verdeschi get trapped on the other side of a “space warp” that has sent the Moon millions of miles away from its previous position. Back on Moonbase Alpha, Maya is having hallucinations and is transforming into various deadly creatures in a delusional attempt to return to her father. She is eventually cured of her madness, just as Koenig and Tony find a way through the warp and rejoin Moonbase Alpha.

MST3K segments written by Joel Hodgson, Trace Beaulieu, Josh Weinstein, Jim Mallon & Kevin Murphy
MST3K segments directed by Vince Rodriguez
Cosmic Princess written by Johnny Byrne & Fred Freiberger (as Charles Woodgrove)
Cosmic Princess directed by Charles Crichton & Peter Medak
Cosmic Princess music by Derek Wadsworth
additional music by Barry Gray

MST3K Guest Cast: none

Cosmic Princess Cast: Martin Landau (Koenig), Barbara Bain (Russell), Catherine Schell (Maya), Brian Blessed (Mentor), Tony Anholt (Verdeschi), Nick Tate (Carter), Zienia Merton (Sandra Benes), Anouska Hempel (Annette Fraser)

LogBook entry by Philip R. Frey Continue reading

The Schizoid Man

Star Trek: The Next GenerationStardate 42437.5: An Enterprise away team answers a distress signal from the habitat of one Dr. Ira Graves, who has been stricken with a terminal illness that could strike at any time. As he has been working for some time on a way to transfer his memories and personality into a computer, he naturally sees Data as the perfect alpha test model.

Order the DVDsteleplay by Tracy Tormè
story by Richard Manning and Hans Beimler
directed by Les Landau
music by Dennis McCarthy

Guest Cast: Diana Muldaur (Dr. Pulaski), W. Morgan Sheppard (Dr. Ira Graves), Suzie Plakson (Lt. Selar), Barbara Alyn Woods (Kareen Brianon)

LogBook entry by Earl Green

Experiment K11: Humanoid Woman

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The KTMA SeasonMST3K Story: The Mads are caught using 3D glasses on a cardboard cut-out of Elvira. They’re also upset that Joel’s ratings actually went up against the Super Bowl. When Joel mentions that they had previously been upset when the ratings were low, Dr. Forrester points out that they’re mad, after all, so what should he expect? Joel and the Bots later play a game of tag that continues even into the theater, leading Joel to declare the theater a “free zone”. Later, Tom Servo meets the girl of his dreams. But just as he’s chatting her up, Joel comes along and drinks juice out of her head. Servo is, naturally, very upset, but gets over it once he learns she’s a blender. At the next break, a tribute to Salvador Dali sees the Satellite of Love overrun by surrealism. After a brief discussion of the Village People, Joel asks Crow what he’ll be up to in the coming week. He doesn’t seem to have much going on. Joel asks that callers not tell them what kind of movies to show, since they can’t control them, anyway. A “Dating Game Kiss” brings an end to the proceedings.

Humanoid Woman Story: A spaceship comes upon a derelict that seems to be the remains of a cloning operation. The ship is lifeless, save for one female survivor. She is taken to the home of a leading researcher, Sergei Lebedev, to determine whether she is a danger or not. Although she has amnesia, she identifies herself as Niya and has memories of her home planet. She finds herself being drawn to Lebedev’s son, Stepan. Encouraged by Lebedev’s associate, Nadezhda Ivanova, Niya begins to have flashbacks to her past, including memories of her “father”, Glan. When representatives of the planet Dessa visit Earth, Niya realizes she is from that planet. She stows away onboard the Astra, a ship traveling to Dessa with the mission to help revitalize the planet. Also on board are Dr. Ivanova, Stepan, and Rakan, the Ambassador from Dessa, who was a friend of Glan’s. They eventually arrive on Dessa to find it virtually lifeless. The only inhabitants occupy underground tunnels and shun the deadly surface of the planet. The Earthlings begin their mission and successfully create an oxygen atmosphere. Turanchoks, a would-be dictator who is using Rakan to further his own ends, attempts to ruin the revitalization plans by poisoning the water and fomenting unrest. He is also able to control Niya through the machinery Glan left behind. When Rakan refuses to continue helping with Turanchoks’ plans, he is stabbed. Near death, Rakan unleashes an amoeba-like creature to destroy those who had betrayed him. Meanwhile, Turanchoks uses his control over Niya to send her to the Astra to destroy it. The attempt is thwarted and Dr. Ivanova is killed during an attempt on Niya’s life. The shock of Ivanova’s death allows Niya to break the mind control that has plagued her. The creature let loose by Rakan, meanwhile, kills Turanchoks and begins to spread over the planet surface. Niya, with the help of the remaining crew, is able to control the creature and its dispersal helps the planet return to life. Despite pleas from Stepan to return to Earth with him, Niya stays behind to help with her planet’s rebirth.

MST3K segments written by Joel Hodgson, Trace Beaulieu, Josh Weinstein, Jim Mallon & Kevin Murphy
MST3K segments directed by Vince Rodriguez
Humanoid Woman written by Kir Bulychyov & Richard Viktorov (as Kir Brown & Richard Victor)
Humanoid Woman directed by Richard Viktorov (as Richard Victor)
Humanoid Woman music by Aleksei Rybnikov

MST3K Guest Cast: none

Humanoid Woman Cast: Yelena Metyolkina (Niya), Vadim Ledogorov (Stepan Lebedev), Uldis Lieldidz (Sergei Lebedev), Yelena Fadeyeva (Maria Pavlovna), Vatslav Dvorzhetsky (Petr Petrovich), Nadezhda Semyontsova (Nadezhda Ivanova), Aleksandr Lazarev (Klimov), Aleksandr Mikhajlov (Dreier), Boris Shcherbakov (Kolotin), Igor Ledogorov (Rakan), Igor Yasulovich (Torki), Gleb Strizhenov (Glan), Vladimir Fyodorov (Turanchoks)

LogBook entry by Philip R. Frey Continue reading

Unnatural Selection

Star Trek: The Next GenerationStardate 42494.8: The Enterprise crew discover the disabled USS Lantree adrift in deep space – adrift because the crew has been inflicted with a disease which induces rapid aging and death! Doctor Pulaski personally involves herself in the search for a cure at a doomed genetic research base and becomes the most recent victim of the disease.

Order the DVDswritten by John Mason and Mike Gray
directed by Paul Lynch
music by Dennis McCarthy

Guest Cast: Diana Muldaur (Dr. Pulaski), Patricia Smith (Dr. Sara Kingsley), Colm Meaney (Transporter Chief O’Brien), J. Patrick McNamara (Captain Taggert), Scott Trost (Ensign)

LogBook entry by Earl Green

Experiment K12: Fugitive Alien

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The KTMA SeasonMST3K Story: Dr. Forrester is attending a Mad Scientist convention in Vegas (he’s staying at Caesar’s, room 666). Dr. Erhardt gives him a call, but is distressed to learn Dr. Forrester has been seeing one of the stars of “La Cage au Faux”. While Dr. Forrester tries to use Dr. Erhardt’s “system” to get more funding, Joel is beginning to get upset at being trapped in space. Despite disparaging remarks concerning the title of this week’s movie, Joel still thinks enough of it to perform “The Theme to Fugitive Alien“. When they go into the theater, Joel notices that Crow is missing and Servo is sitting in his seat. Servo has nothing to say on the matter. Only the threat of getting a voice like Punky Brewster gets even a reaction from him. Gypsy gives the game away, though, by coming in with Crow’s head. Joel doesn’t buy Servo’s excuse that they were just trying to install a popcorn popper for Joel’s birthday. Joel and Crow take some time to discuss celebrities who you never see together, like Michael Jackson and Diana Ross or Jim Bacchus and Richard Nixon. Joel holds a dance contest and Gypsy wins, despite getting a zero on her lip synch. Joel announces that an official fan club has been started and invites people to write in or call. The show ends abruptly with a “Let’s Go!” from Servo and an “All right” from Joel.

Fugitive Alien Story: The Wolf Raiders make a brutal attack on Earth in an attempt to conquer the planet. One Raider, Ken, finds himself unable to kill a child. When his partner attempts to kill the child himself, Ken attempts to restrain him, but accidentally causes his death. Now labeled a traitor, Ken goes on the run. After a long chase, Ken eludes the Raiders by exiting his ship just before blowing it up. An Earth starship, Bacchus 3, rescues him, unaware of who he is. The crew do not trust Ken, but his knowledge and skill allow the Bacchus 3 to escape the attacking Raiders. Back on Earth, Ken escapes from the authorities and attempts to get off planet. Sneaking aboard a starship, he is confronted by Captain Joe of the Bacchus 3. Captain Joe has just learned his whole family has been killed by the Raiders. Seeing Ken’s remorse, Captain Joe decides to take him on as a crew member. Meanwhile, back on Ken’s home planet of Valna, the evil ruler sends an assassin after Ken: Rita, Ken’s girlfriend and the sister of his partner. The Bacchus 3 is sent to the planet Carraro on a mission for the government. Ken is arrested while exploring the planet and imprisoned. He breaks out, frees a captive officer of the planet Cesar, and together they attempt to rendezvous with the Bacchus 3. They are rescued by Rita, who has tracked Ken to Carraro. After an emotional reunion, Rita finds herself unable to kill Ken. When they are ambushed, Rita is tragically killed. Ken and the Cesar officer finally meet the Bacchus 3, but Ken’s adventures are just beginning.

MST3K segments written by Joel Hodgson, Trace Beaulieu, Josh Weinstein, Jim Mallon & Kevin Murphy
MST3K segments directed by Vince Rodriguez
Fugitive Alien written by Keiichi Abe, Bunkou Wakatsuki (as Bunzou Wakatsuki), Yoshihisa Araki, Hiroyasu Yamamura (as Hiroyasu Yamaura), Hideyoshi Nagasaki (as Hideyoshi Nagasaka) & Toyohiro Andô (as Toyohiro Andou)
Fugitive Alien directed by Minoru Kanaya & Kiyosumi Kuzakawa (as Kiyosumi Kukazawa)
Fugitive Alien music by Norio Maeda

MST3K Guest Cast: none

Fugitive Alien Cast: Tatsuya Azuma (Ken), Miyuki Tanigawa (Tammy), Joe Shishido (Captain Joe), Choei Takahashi (Rocky), Tsutomu Yukawa (Dan), Hiro Tateyama (Biri), Keiko Mari (Rita), Akihiko Hirata

LogBook entry by Philip R. Frey Continue reading

A Matter Of Honor

Star Trek: The Next GenerationStardate 42506.5: Riker becomes the first Federation officer ever to serve on board a Klingon vessel which is slowly warping toward its destruction – and the negligence of a Benzite “exchange student” on the Enterprise is responsible for arousing the ruthless Klingon captain’s suspicions, provoking a savage attack on the Enterprise…

Order the DVDsteleplay by Burton Armus
story by Wanda M. Haight, Gregory Amos and Burton Armus
directed by Rob Bowman
music by Ron Jones

Guest Cast: Diana Muldaur (Dr. Pulaski), John Putch (Ensign Mendon), Christopher Collins (Captain Kargan), Brian Thompson (Lt. Klag), Colm Meaney (Chief O’Brien), Peter Parros (Tactics Officer), Laura Drake (Vemka)

LogBook entry by Earl Green

The Measure Of A Man

Star Trek: The Next GenerationStardate 42523.7: When Data refuses to participate in a Starfleet scientist’s android experiments where he will serve not only as a blueprint but as a guinea pig and spare part supply, he is put on trial and Picard wrangles with the premise that Data is not a free agent but the property of Starfleet – and Captain Louvois assigns Riker to prosecute.

Order the DVDswritten by Melinda M. Snodgrass
directed by Robert Scheerer
music by Dennis McCarthy

Guest Cast: Diana Muldaur (Dr. Pulaski), Amanda McBroom (Captain Phillipa Louvois), Clyde Kusatsu (Admiral Nakamura), Brian Brophy (Commander Bruce Maddox), Whoopi Goldberg (Guinan), Colm Meaney (Chief O’Brien)

LogBook entry by Earl Green

Experiment K13: SST – Death Flight

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The KTMA SeasonMST3K Story: Before the credits, Joel and the Bots sing the “SST Death Flight Theme Song.” Dr. Forrester has returned from Vegas with sacks and sacks of money that he won playing Keno. He has a few gifts for Dr. Erhardt and a really bad movie for Joel that Bert Convy gave him in a parking lot. At the first break, Joel tries to give Servo some idea what pain feels like. Servo laughs off the “stub your toe” and “fiery Yugo crash” settings, but really feels it at the “Arsenio” setting. Gypsy’s voice suddenly becomes soft and sultry. She sings “Happy Birthday, Mr. President” for Joel, but he doesn’t understand why she sounds so different. Servo finally admits he was throwing his voice. Later, Servo sings “The Banana Boat Song” while the rest of the crew dances the Limbo. After the movie, Joel and the Bots answer their first viewer mail and invite people to keep writing in.

SST – Death Flight Story: The Maiden flight of a new Super Sonic Transport brings together a myriad of different people. They include out-of-work sportscaster Lyle Kingman and his wife, promotions director Tim Vernon and his girlfriend Angela, the plane’s designer Willy Basset, potential buyer Hank Fairbanks, and Dr. Ralph Therman who is bringing a sample of a deadly form of influenza to Paris. The ship is piloted by Captain Jim Walsh, whose by-the-book attitude led to Fairbanks losing his pilot’s license. Further complicating things for Fairbanks, the head Stewardess is his ex-girlfriend, Mae. Meanwhile, disgruntled mechanic Les Phillips has sabotaged the hydraulics system in order to force the flight to turn back. Walsh refuses to believe that the plane is in danger until Phillips admits to the sabotage, but by then it is too late: the plane could crash at any moment. An attempt to re-route the pressure goes wrong and a massive explosion rocks the plane. To make matters worse, the influenza sample is released by the explosion and the passengers begin to show symptoms of the disease. When this is learned on the ground, Paris refuses to allow the plane to land. Diplomacy is brought to bear to allow them to land in London, but the passengers decide to go with an alternate plan of landing in Senegal, the only place in reach where proper quarantine facilities exist. Unfortunately, they don’t have enough fuel and they go down in the jungle. Although several passengers die, most are rescued and the spread of the virus is stopped.

MST3K segments written by Joel Hodgson, Trace Beaulieu, Josh Weinstein, Jim Mallon & Kevin Murphy
MST3K segments director unknown
SST – Death Flight written by Meyer Dolinsky, Robert L. Joseph & William Roberts
from a story by Guerdon Trueblood
SST – Death Flight directed by David Lowell Rich
SST – Death Flight music by John Cacavas

MST3K Guest Cast: Faye Burkholder (Puppet Operation and Voices)

SST – Death Flight Cast: Bert Convy (Vernon), Peter Graves (Paul Whitley), Lorne Greene (Cole), Tina Louise (Mae), George Maharis (Les Phillips), Burgess Meredith (Basset), Doug McClure (Fairbanks), Martin Milner (Kingman), Brock Peters (Therman), Robert Reed (Walsh), Susan Strasberg (Nancy Kingman), Chrystie Jenner (Kathy), Misty Rowe (Angela), Billy Crystal (David), John de Lancie (Bob Connors), Regis Philbin (Harry Carter), Robert Ito (Roy Nakamura)

LogBook entry by Philip R. Frey Continue reading

The Dauphin

Star Trek: The Next GenerationStardate 42568.8: Wesley is attracted to an alien princess whose is accompanied on the Enterprise by a severe governess as they journey to a world where they will become the new leaders of her civilization, and despite the warnings from the less-than-human governess, Wesley also finds out that the princess has some surprises in store for him as well.

Order the DVDswritten by Scott Rubenstein and Leonard Mlodinow
directed by Rob Bowman
music by Dennis McCarthy

Guest Cast: Diana Muldaur (Dr. Pulaski), Paddi Edwards (Anya), Jaime Hubbard (Salia), Whoopi Goldberg (Guinan), Colm Meaney (Chief O’Brien), Peter Neptune (Aron), Madchen Amick (Teenage Girl), Cindy Sorenson (Furry Animal), Jennifer Barlow (Ensign Gibson)

LogBook entry by Earl Green

Experiment K14: Mighty Jack

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The KTMA SeasonMST3K Story: Dr. Forrester and Dr. Erhardt are having an argument over changing their approach. Dr. Erhardt feels they aren’t really mad scientists, just angry. Dr. Forrester thinks Dr. Erhardt has turned into Florence Henderson. Joel’s been listening in since Thursday and Dr. Erhardt has a casserole in the oven. The Bots latest attempt at humor involves welding themselves together. Joel only thinks it’s funny once they add women’s underwear to the ensemble. Later, Crow and Servo discuss how they can’t understand what humans find funny, including the appeal of Punky Brewster. Servo thinks Joel’s recent comedy attempts are an indication of a fatal error. He suggests destroying Joel as a solution. When Crow bowls for the Inter-Satellite Championship, the shoes lead him to accidentally reveal his sense of smell. Joel wants to play something else, but the Bots aren’t interested in playing Murderball or Rock-Scissors-Paper, making Joel regret giving the Bots free will. After the movie, Joel and the Bots answer some viewer mail. They all have fans, but Servo gets fired up by his female fan.

Mighty Jack Story: An evil organization known as Q has been wreaking havoc all over the world. A paramilitary group code-named “Mighty Jack” is formed to combat Q. Meanwhile in Tokyo, the mysterious Harold Atari is kidnapped. Colonel Yubuki, leader of Mighty Jack, believes Q to be behind the kidnapping, so he sends Mighty Jack on a rescue mission. Jerry, the forward scout sent in to locate Atari, is captured. Together, Jerry and Atari contact Mighty Jack and are rescued after a furious battle. It is only then that Atari reveals that he is the new Commander of Mighty Jack. Their next assignment is to investigate a missing Antarctic installation. They find a Q base hidden inside an iceberg, built with freezing technology previously unknown. Their investigations lead to several suspects: scientists Dr. Takibana and his son Fritz, the mysterious Manuel Perez, and international reporter Roberto Okamura. Eventually it is revealed that Fritz is behind the theft of the technology with the help of Perez and Okamura. The efforts of the Mighty Jack team lead to their deaths, the destruction of the freezing device and the defeat of Q.

MST3K segments written by Joel Hodgson, Trace Beaulieu, Josh Weinstein, Jim Mallon, Kevin Murphy & Faye Burkholder
MST3K segments director unknown
Mighty Jack written by Shinichi Sekizawa & Eizaburou Siba
Mighty Jack directed by Kazuho Mitsuta
Mighty Jack music by Isao Tomita

MST3K Guest Cast: Alexandra Carr & Faye Burkholder (Puppet Operations and Voices)

Mighty Jack Cast: Hideaki Nitani, Naoko Kobo, Hiroshi Ninami, Eisei Amamoto, Masanari Nhei, Wakako Ikeda, Akira Kasuga, Seikou Fukioka, Noriaki Inoue, Yoshitaka Tanaka, Mitsubu Ohya, Eijirou Yanagi, Kenji Sahara

LogBook entry by Philip R. Frey Continue reading

Experiment K15: Superdome

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The KTMA SeasonMST3K Story: Servo starts writing a letter to his Uncle Wally, pausing once he realizes that he doesn’t have one. He continues writing anyway, flashing back to the day before when he convinced the Mads to send them all back to Earth. Crow, however, ruins the plan by insulting them, resulting in Superdome being sent in retaliation. Servo continues his letter-inspired reminiscences by flashing back to the pain experiment Joel performed on him and, later, to a heavily subjective view of Joel and the other Bots’ recent behavior. A “videotaped montage piece” runs as Servo thinks of the good times on board the Satellite of Love. He’s annoyed to learn there’s more movie and that the episode won’t end on his dramatic montage. Servo has so completely exhausted himself with talking about the movie that he’s in sick bay at the close. Joel and Crow take a look at some artwork sent in by fans as well as some letters and a photo of a fan with his cat, which the fan claims looks like Crow. He admits to seeing a similarity. After another pitch for the MST3000 Fan Club, Joel and Crow say good night.

Superdome Story: It’s Superbowl time in New Orleans and it’s the Cougars versus the Rangers. Cougars linebacker Dave Walecki and his wife are having marital difficulties. P.K. Jackson, a former player, is trying to fix the game for his backers in New York. Agent Chip Green is trying to save his job by signing Cougars quarterback Jim McCauley. Cougars general manager Mike Shelley is carrying on a romance with reporter Lainie Wylie, who followed him to New Orleans. Things start to heat up when a man from league security is killed. A stewardess who witnessed the murder also turns up dead and her death is blamed on Cougars player Scott Hennerson. During all this, Green is making no progress with McCauley and things are worsening for the Waleckis. P.K. Jackson tries to drug McCauley to keep him out of the game, but Green’s daughter Gail, who was trying to soften up McCauley, is drugged instead and nearly dies. The operative from New York turns out to be Lainie, who has used her connection to Shelley to gain access. The murders were part of the New York Syndicate’s attempt to fix the game. Lainie is eventually cornered, where she reveals all. Lainie’s last attempt on McCauley, wiring up the hot tub to electrocute him, is thwarted. Green quits his job, the Waleckis make up and the game is able to begin uninterrupted.

MST3K segments written by Joel Hodgson, Trace Beaulieu, Josh Weinstein, Jim Mallon, Kevin Murphy & Faye Burkholder
MST3K segments director unknown
Superdome written by Barry Oringer
from a story by Barry Oringer and Bill Svanoe
Superdome directed by Jerry Jameson
Superdome music by John Cacavas

MST3K Guest Cast: none

Superdome Cast: David Janssen (Mike Shelley), Edie Adams (Joyce), Clifton Davis (Jackson), Ken Howard (Walecki), Susan Howard (Nancy), Van Johnson (Green), Donna Mills (Wylie), Ed Nelson (Beldridge), Tom Selleck (McCauley), Bubba Smith (Moses), Dick Butkus (Hennerson), Michael Pataki (Tony), M. Emmet Walsh (Whitley), Robin Mattson (Gail)

LogBook entry by Philip R. Frey Continue reading

Experiment K16: City On Fire

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The KTMA SeasonMST3K Story: The Mads have received notice from the Mad Scientists’ League that they are actually “mildly peeved researchers” and may have their licenses revoked. Dr. Forrester worries that they will have to re-enter the private sector. Dr. Erhardt doesn’t want to go back to fruit inspection. To illustrate to Dr. Erhardt how the movies they show utilize science, the Mads watch City On Fire at the same time they send it to Joel. The Bots set up a telescope so they can run the old “black ink on the eyepiece” joke on Joel. When Joel tries to demonstrate a new invention, the Hell-In-A-Handbag, the Bots begin to lose themselves in their roles. The successful test scares the bejeezus out of Crow, which is sweet revenge for Joel. Later Joel has the Bots perform a “double time” march to a chant about their situation on the Satellite of Love. After the movie, Gypsy shows up, having been working on the newsletter and fan club materials. Joel shows the stuff off and suggests people write in to join.

City On Fire Story: A series of events play out around the opening of a new hospital. The Mayor, William Dudley, is attempting to set up a run for Governor while at the same time wooing Diana Brockhurst-Lautrec, the widow of the previous Governor. Dr. Frank Whitman, the head of the new hospital and a figure from Diana’s past, is dealing with the fact that government cutbacks have left the hospital poorly equipped to serve its purpose. Herman Stover, a worker in the local refinery who went to school with Diana, loses his job. This, combined with his obsession with Diana and growing resentment, leads Herman to sabotage the refinery. This causes a massive fire that spreads quickly, consuming whole neighborhoods and eventually threatening the hospital itself. Following the action are the fire chief, Albert Risley, and an opportunistic news reporter, Maggie Grayson. Things take a turn for the worse when the fire surrounds the hospital, causing a firestorm, which begins to consume the oxygen inside. A desperate plan to rescue the patients mostly succeeds, although many lives are lost.

MST3K segments written by Joel Hodgson, Trace Beaulieu, Josh Weinstein, Jim Mallon & Kevin Murphy
MST3K segments directed by Todd Ziegler
City On Fire written by Jack Hill & David P. Lewis and Céline La Frenière
City On Fire directed by Alvin Rakoff
City On Fire music by William & Matthew McCauley

MST3K Guest Cast: none

City On Fire Cast: Barry Newman (Frank Whitman), Susan Clark (Diana Brockhurst-Lautrec), Shelley Winters (Nurse Andrea Harper), Leslie Nielsen (Mayor William Dudley), James Franciscus (Jimbo), Ava Gardner (Maggie Grayson), Henry Fonda (Chief Albert Risley), Jonathan Welsh (Herman Stover), Hilary Labow (Mrs. Adams), Richard Donat (Capt. Harrison Risley)

LogBook entry by Philip R. Frey Continue reading

Contagion

Star Trek: The Next GenerationStardate 42609.1: After witnessing the tragic destruction of the Galaxy class starship Yamato in the Neutral Zone, Picard follows Yamato Captain Donald Varley’s haunch that the planet Iconia contains the valuable remnants of a now extinct but technologically advanced civilization, leaving Riker on the malfunctioning Enterprise to deal with a Romulan warship.

Order the DVDswritten by Steve Gerber and Beth Woods
directed by Joseph L. Scanlan
music by Dennis McCarthy

Guest Cast: Diana Muldaur (Dr. Pulaski), Thalmus Rasulala (Captain Donald Varley), Carolyn Seymour (Subcommander Taris), Dana Sparks (Tactics Officer), Colm Meaney (Chief O’Brien), Folkert Schmidt (Doctor)

LogBook entry by Earl Green

The Royale

Star Trek: The Next GenerationStardate 42625.4: Riker, Worf and Data transport to the surface of what should be a poison-shrouded world after finding debris of a NASA space vessel, and discover a structure containing a reproduction of the literary Hotel and Casino Royale. Within the hotel lies the remains of the astronaut whose last possession was the cheap novel upon which the Royale was based. The Away Team’s only help is from the book itself as they read their lines – and between their lines.

Order the DVDswritten by Keith Mills (a.k.a. Tracy Torme)
directed by Cliff Bole
music by Ron Jones

Star Trek: TNGGuest Cast: Diana Muldaur (Dr. Pulaski), Sam Anderson (The Assistant Manager), Jill Jacobson (Vanessa), Leo Garcia (The Bellboy), Noble Willingham (Texas), Colm Meaney (Chief O’Brien), Gregory Beecroft (“Mickey D”)

LogBook entry by Earl Green

Experiment K17: Time Of The Apes

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The KTMA SeasonMST3K Story: The Mads try to contact Joel, but Crow answers. He and Servo are evasive about Joel’s whereabouts. The Mads quickly tire of the Bots’ games and send Time Of The Apes. The Bots mention Joel throughout the movie, but there is no sign of him. Gypsy shows up with Joel’s uniform in her mouth, which means…”Joel is floating naked in space!” The Bots consider what to do about Joel, while someone or something keeps pounding on the hull of the ship. Servo decides it’s space barnacles, but movie sign prevents Crow from firing the retro rockets to “shake them off.” Cambot shows some video footage of Joel that tricks Crow into thinking Joel is back. Servo then shows how reality simply can’t be trusted on a TV show. It all ends with a shot of Joel (or a small, plastic representation thereof) floating in space, while the Bots ponder life without him.

Time Of The Apes Story: While visiting the lab of his uncle Charlie, Johnny and his friend Caroline are being shown experiments in suspended animation by Catherine, one of the lab assistants. An earthquake hits while Johnny is in a sleep capsule and Catherine and Caroline climb into two others for safety. The capsules are accidentally activated and they wake to find themselves in the distant future. Almost immediately they are captured by intelligent apes. They are taken to be executed, but escape and come into contact with Pepe, a little ape girl. She takes them to her friend Godo, the only other human. They are recaptured, but Godo’s execution is halted by the ape Commander. The Commander proves to be civilized and decries the mistreatment the humans have suffered at the hands of the Police Chief. Although Catherine believes the Commander is trustworthy, Pepe helps Johnny and Godo to escape. Meanwhile, there is a mysterious spaceship that seems to be keeping an eye on the proceedings. When Godo, Johnny and Pepe attempt to rescue Catherine and Caroline, the flying saucer disables the apes’ weapons, allowing them to escape. Catherine has learned that the flying saucer is from Green Mountain and appears to be friendly to humans. With the apes in pursuit, the humans try to make for Green Mountain and are confronted by the Police Chief who reveals that he hates Godo because he blames Godo for the death of his family. The space ship arrives and reveals that the Chief is himself responsible for his own family’s death. The Commander appears and asks the humans to stay with him. They decide to make for Green Mountain in hopes of finding other humans. However, at Green Mountain they find a computer that controls the Earth and demands that they either leave the planet or be transported to the future. They decide to go to the future, but Godo balks and is blasted by the computer. After entering sleep capsules just like those at the lab, the humans awake to find themselves back in their own time. Godo, meanwhile, has been sent somewhere unknown, though Catherine says he will always live on in their hearts.

MST3K segments written by Joel Hodgson, Trace Beaulieu, Josh Weinstein, Jim Mallon & Kevin Murphy
additional writing by Brian Funk
MST3K segments directed by Vince Rodriguez
Time Of The Apes written by Keiiche Abe
from an original story by Sakyo Komatsu, Kouji Tanaka and Aritsune Toyoda
Time Of The Apes directed by Atsuo Okunaka and Kiyo Sumi Fukazawa
Time Of The Apes music by Toshiaki Tsushima

MST3K Guest Cast: none

Time Of The Apes Cast: Reiko Tokunaga (Catherine), Hiroko Saito (Caroline), Masaaki Kaji (Johnny), Wataru Omae (Commander), Tetsuya Ushio (Godo), Baku Hatakeyama (Police Chief Gebar), Kazue Takita (Pepe), Noboru Nakaya, Hiroyuki Kawase

LogBook entry by Philip R. Frey Continue reading

Time Squared

Star Trek: The Next GenerationStardate 42679.2: Picard is left beside himself when the Enterprise encounters a future incarnation of himself in a battered Enterprise shuttlecraft, containing visual and captain’s logs describing the destruction of the ship and its crew, except for Picard, by an “energy vortex,” and according to the logs, the encounter is only six hours away.

Order the DVDsteleplay by Burton Armus
story by Kurt Michael Bensmiller
directed by Joseph L. Scanlan
music by Dennis McCarthy

Guest Cast: Diana Muldaur (Dr. Pulaski), Colm Meaney (Chief O’Brien)

LogBook entry by Earl Green

The Icarus Factor

Star Trek: The Next GenerationStardate 42686.4: Riker, offered a command of his own patrolling a hazardous area of deep space, is also offered advice and a long-overdue retraction of old hostilities from his father, but the impetuous first officer refuses all of this in an attempt to maintain an image of independence in the eyes of his crewmates and his father.

Order the DVDsteleplay by David Assael and Robert L. McCullough
story by David Assael
directed by Robert Iscove
music by Ron Jones

Guest Cast: Diana Muldaur (Dr. Pulaski), Colm Meaney (Chief O’Brien), Mitchell Ryan (Kyle Riker), Lance Spellerberg (Ensign Herbert)

LogBook entry by Earl Green

Pen Pals

Star Trek: The Next GenerationStardate 42695.3: While on an extended research patrol through a star cluster whose planets’ geologic activity rips them apart from inside, Data on the Enterprise makes contact with a primitive being on one of these planets which is now in immediate danger and has to plead with the prime directive- conscious Picard to help his newfound friend.

Order the DVDsteleplay by Melinda M. Snodgrass
story by Hannah Louise Shearer
directed by Winrich Kolbe
music by Dennis McCarthy

Guest Cast: Diana Muldaur (Dr. Pulaski), Nicholas Cascone (Ensign Davies), Nikki Cox (Sarjenka), Ann H. Gillespie (Ensign Hildebrant), Colm Meaney (Chief O’Brien), Whitney Rydbeck (Ensign Alans)

LogBook entry by Earl Green

Experiment K18: The Million Eyes Of Sumuru

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The KTMA SeasonMST3K Story: A “previously on Mystery Science Theater 3000” segment is presented where we see flashbacks to Joel floating naked in space while the Bots discuss the ramifications. The Mads are finally able to get Joel back and take the opportunity to mock him. When movie sign comes, Joel says he “can’t wait” to get his hands on the Bots. Ultimately, Joel fits the Bots with “Idio-probes” as punishment. They still don’t seem very remorseful. They do, however, fess up that Gypsy got caught in the “spiral-on-down” and they left her there. Joel frees her with a “Robo-Purge” button. Almost an hour into the movie, Servo mentions that he has to “make brownies for the pine wood derby” and won’t be able to watch the rest of the movie (although he can come out of the kitchen for the host segments). Joel tries to do a Courtroom sketch, but the Bots cause it to degenerate quickly into a wacky stream-of-consciousness piece. Later, the Bots question Joel on how he could survive in Space for the five weeks since they had left him there. Joel responds with an acoustic rendition of the section of the MST3K theme about reminding oneself “it’s just a show.” After the movie, Joel has to move Servo’s mouth for him, since it’s broken. Joel also mentions that there are nine hundred members of the fan club so far and again gives information on joining before sending it back to Earth.

The Million Eyes Of Sumuru Story: The death of a secretary to an Eastern dignitary indicates danger for President Boong, leader of an Eastern nation. CIA Agent Nick West is contacted to look into the death. Along for the ride is West’s buddy, millionaire Tommy Carter. Initial investigations lead the two to Sumuru’s villa, where Carter learns that Sumuru is placing her operatives all over the world by having them marry or become the girlfriends of prominent men. When they are discovered, Carter and West find themselves framed for murder and on their way to the Orient to continue the chase. As soon as they arrive, West is kidnapped by Sumuru and blackmailed into joining her in a scheme to get close to President Boong by impersonating a new member of Boong’s staff and arranging for the President’s assassination. While Sumuru “distracts” West for a while, the first attempt is made, but it is foiled by the use of a double, who is killed in the President’s place. West is taken to Sumuru’s headquarters while Carter, with the help of defecting Sumuru Agent Helga, puts together a rescue. Carter and the authorities storm Sumuru’s headquarters, rescue West and blast the place to the ground, leaving Sumuru defeated and apparently dead.

MST3K segments written by Joel Hodgson, Trace Beaulieu, Josh Weinstein, Jim Mallon & Kevin Murphy;
additional writing by Brian Funk
MST3K segments directed by Todd Ziegler
The Million Eyes Of Sumuru written by Kevin Kavanagh
from a story by Harry Alan Towers
based on the stories by Sax Rohmer
The Million Eyes Of Sumuru directed by Lindsay Shonteff
The Million Eyes Of Sumuru music by John Scott

MST3K Guest Cast: none

The Million Eyes Of Sumuru Cast: Frankie Avalon (Tommy Carter), George Nader (Nick West), Shirley Eaton (Sumuru), Wilfrid Hyde-White (Colonel Baisbrook), Klaus Kinski (President Boong), Patti Chandler (Louise), Salli Sachse (Mikki), Ursula Rank (Erno), Krista Nell (Zoe), Maria Rohm (Helga), Paul Chang (Inspector Koo), Essie Huang (Kitty), Jon Fong (Colonel Medika)

LogBook entry by Philip R. Frey Continue reading

Q Who

Star Trek: The Next GenerationStardate 42761.3: Q returns once more to the Enterprise to plead his case to Picard for a position as a crewman on the ship after being expelled from the Q Continuum. When refused, the godlike alien propels the Enterprise thousands of light years to prove to Picard that some threats are too much for humanity, and the Borg is one of these threats…

Order the DVDswritten by Maurice Hurley
directed by Rob Bowman
music by Ron Jones

Guest Cast: John de Lancie (Q), Lycia Naff (Ensign Gomez), Colm Meaney (Chief O’Brien), Whoopi Goldberg (Guinan)

Notes: This episode is the first to show the Borg, a race first mentioned (though not by name) in The Neutral Zone. According to writer/producer Maurice Hurley, the Borg were originally intended to be insects instead of cyborgs; budget shortfalls meant costuming cutbacks, even to the point that “stillsuit” costumes from Dune were heavily redressed as Borg costumes.

LogBook entry by Earl Green

Experiment K19: Hangar 18

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The KTMA SeasonMST3K Story: The movie starts after an extremely brief introduction. When Joel tries to work out the trajectory of an incoming meteor shower, Crow just acts like a petulant child until an aggravated Joel makes him “get the belt”. For his calculations, Joel needs to access some of Crow’s memory, so the crew looks over his memory banks and dumps useless information like the King Family Specials, Mario Andretti STP commercials and tons of infomercials. (Crow apparently fell asleep watching KTMA late one night.) Finally having gained access, Joel shows Crow’s first memory. In the flashback it’s shown that CROW stands for “Cybernetic Remotely Operated Woman”. Crow takes it far too seriously until Joel admits it was all a needlessly complicated practical joke. After the movie, Joel is pleased to announce that the Mystery Science Theater Fan Club has almost 1,000 members. Servo announces that the thousandth member will win a Demon Dog, his or her name mentioned on the air and self satisfaction.

Hangar 18 Story: While on an otherwise routine satellite launching mission, three astronauts encounter a flying saucer. Accidental contact leads to the death of one of the astronauts and to the saucer crash-landing on Earth. NASA recovers the alien craft for study and stows it in a secret location: Hangar 18. Meanwhile, one of the President’s aides proceeds with a cover-up of the whole situation, hoping that it can be kept quiet until after the upcoming election. When the two surviving pilots, Steve Bancroft and Lew Price, escape their captivity, an all-out manhunt begins. After Price is killed, Bancroft is able to make it to Hangar 18 where he finally sees and boards the alien spacecraft. An attempt to destroy the space ship and everyone involved by crashing a plane into Hangar 18 is thwarted when the alien ship’s hull proves invulnerable to the massive explosion. Bancroft and most of the NASA scientists survive and all is revealed.

MST3K segments written by Joel Hodgson, Trace Beaulieu, Josh Weinstein, Jim Mallon & Kevin Murphy (and most likely additional writing by Brian Funk)
MST3K segments director unknown
Hangar 18 written by Thomas C. Chapman (as Tom Chapman), James L. Conway, Steven Thornley & Stephen Lord
Hangar 18 directed by James L. Conway
Hangar 18 music by John Cacavas

MST3K Guest Cast: none.

Hangar 18 Cast: Darren McGavin (Harry Forbes), Robert Vaughn (Gordon Cain), Gary Collins (Steve Bancroft), James Hampton (Lew Price), Philip Abbott (Frank Morrison), Pamela Bellwood (Sarah Michaels), Tom Hallick (Phil Cameron), Steven Keats (Paul Bannister), Cliff Osmond (Sheriff Barlow), Joseph Campanella (Frank Lafferty), William Schallert (Professor Mills)

LogBook entry by Philip R. Frey Continue reading

Samaritan Snare

Star Trek: The Next GenerationStardate 42779.1: Riker and the crew attempt to rescue Geordi from a slow witted crew of Pakleds who claim to need the chief engineer’s technical expertise, while the captain, who is at a medical research base receiving a heart transplant, is about to die in the hands of a surgeon not possessed of Dr. Pulaski’s skill.

Order the DVDswritten by Robert L. McCullough
directed by Les Landau
music by Dennis McCarthy

Guest Cast: Diana Muldaur (Dr. Pulaski), Christopher Collins (Grebnedlog), Leslie Morris (Reginod), Daniel Benzali (Chief Surgeon), Lycia Naff (Ensign Gomez), Tzi Ma (Biomolecular Physiologist)

LogBook entry by Earl Green

Experiment K20: The Last Chase

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The KTMA SeasonMST3K Story: Dr. Forrester is experimenting on Dr. Erhardt, attempting to prove cold fusion is possible, but only in the human mouth. The experiment seems to be a success (and tastes like Peach Fizz), but Dr. Erhardt says it was just the dry heaves. In frustration, they send Joel the movie. When Joel tries to teach the Bots about conscience, they don’t seem too keen on it. He tries to use a conscience module on Crow, but accidentally uses paranoia instead. Joel later takes some time to announce the 1000th fan letter has been received and shows off the Devil Dog hat that was given as a prize. They read a letter from a fan who enjoyed seeing Joel hit Servo in the head, so he does it again. The final letter of the day compares MST3K favorably to a children’s show featuring Commander Paul (then Commander Dave, then Commander Tom). On that positive note, Joel and the Bots say goodbye.

The Last Chase Story: A deadly virus has wiped out most of the population of the eastern United States. Due to the dangers of spreading the disease, automobiles and other gas-powered transportation have been outlawed. Twenty years after the plague, ex-race car driver Franklin Hart still finds himself yearning for the freedom of the open road, even as he lectures in support of the Mass Transit Authority. Feeling burned out, Hart loses control during a lecture and openly denounces the government. In punishment, he is “retired” and decides the time has come to leave for California. When Hart runs, he escapes the authorities with the help of a young teen named Ring. Together they begin the journey. Hawkins, leader of the Authority, sends a retired fighter pilot, Capt. J.G. Williams after them in one of the few remaining airplanes. Williams catches up with the fugitives and strafes them, wounding Hart. Hart suddenly wakes to find himself in an Indian village populated by refugees from civilization. Hart and Ring find some comfort there, but are eventually flushed out when an assault team attacks the village. Hawkins next reveals a massive, Cold War-era laser, which he hopes to use to destroy Hart and the car. Williams, however, has other plans. He meets Hart on the road in an odd game of “Chicken”, which Hart wins. Williams by now has had a complete change of heart is only bluffing them in order to keep flying. As Hart and Williams approach the laser, Williams sees it and warns Hart. When Hart refuses to get off the road, Williams recognizes that the only way to stop the laser is to sacrifice himself, which he does by flying straight into it. With the laser out of commission, Hart and Ring are free to complete their journey to California, a symbol of freedom to all of America.

MST3K segments written by Joel Hodgson, Trace Beaulieu, Josh Weinstein, Jim Mallon & Kevin Murphy
additional writing by Brian Funk
MST3K segments directed by Vince Rodriguez
The Last Chase screenplay by C.R. O’Christopher and Roy Moore & Martyn Burke
The Last Chase story by C.R. O’Christopher
The Last Chase directed by Martyn Burke
The Last Chase music by Gil Melle (credited as Gil Mellè)

MST3K Guest Cast: none

The Last Chase Cast: Lee Majors (Franklyn Hart), Burgess Meredith (Capt. J.G. Williams), Chris Makepeace (Ring), Alexandra Stewart (Eudora), Diane D’Aquila (Santana), George Touliatos (Hawkins), Harvey Atkin (Jud), Ben Gordon (Morely), Hugh Webster (Fetch), Deborah Burgess (Miss Rawlston), Trudy Young (Mrs. Hart)

LogBook entry by Philip R. Frey Continue reading

Up The Long Ladder

Star Trek: The Next GenerationStardate 42823.2: Signals arrive from two colonies in a distant star system, one of which is found by the Enterprise crew to be a motley collection of “primitives,” and the other, a group of clones whose gene pool is fading. The clones need fresh genes from the crew and are willing to use force to ensure their survive.

Order the DVDswritten by Melinda M. Snodgrass
directed by Winrich Kolbe
music by Ron Jones

Guest Cast: Diana Muldaur (Dr. Pulaski), Barrie Ingham (Danilo O’Dell), Jon de Vries (Wilson Granger / Victor Granger), Rosalyn Landor (Brenna O’Dell), Colm Meaney (Chief O’Brien)

LogBook entry by Earl Green

Experiment K21: The “Legend Of Dinosaurs”

Mystery Science Theater 3000: The KTMA SeasonMST3K Story: The Mads have come up with a “Joel Is Dead” scheme that they hope will give a boost to the “marketing arm of Mystery Science Theater”. Joel doesn’t care for the idea, but the Mads really need the money to start their new theme park, Six Flags over Ten to the Twelfth Power. Joel has Cambot work up a special effect that makes Joel seem to be carried away by a small child. The Bots consider just how “special” the effect was. At the halfway point, it’s time for a foray into sit-com land, courtesy of Joel’s TV Sit-Com Simulator. Later, Joel shows the Bots how special effects can make a small model dinosaur look really huge. They seem more interested in whether it’s anatomically correct or not. Joel mentions that they are going on hiatus. During the break, Crow says he is going to space camp, while Servo is going to fill his head with Cocoa Butter and Surf ’til he drops. Joel will be working on his Bob Hope impression (which needs it). Joel takes time to thank all the fans and members of the fan club along with the folks at Channel 21 (KTMA). He asks everyone who enjoyed the show to write in before saying a big “Goodbye” for the summer.

The “Legend Of Dinosaurs” Story: A young girl falls into a deep cavern while walking near the base of Mount Fuji. There she sees what she believes to be a dinosaur egg and passes on her discovery before she dies. A young rock expert who learns of the woman is moved to seek out proof of the dinosaur egg’s existence. His father had theorized that dinosaur eggs were beneath Mt. Fuji, but had been rebuffed by the scientific community. His son has similar trouble, as his investigations stand in the way of the local “Dragon Festival”. Still, everything points to the existence of a Plesiosaur in the waters near Mt. Fuji. Mysterious deaths lead to a large-scale effort to find the monster, but it is abandoned when no evidence is found. Attacks in broad daylight eventually make it clear that there are two dinosaurs on the loose: a Plesiosaur and a Pterodactyl. The two prehistoric beasts wind up fighting each other. This activity causes Mt. Fuji to erupt, burying them both.

MST3K segments written by Joel Hodgson, Trace Beaulieu, Josh Weinstein, Jim Mallon & Kevin Murphy
additional writing by Brian Funk
MST3K segments directed by Vince Rodriguez
The “Legend Of Dinosaurs” written by Masaru Igami, Takeshi Matsumoto (as Isao Matsumoto) & Ichirô Ootsu (as Ichiro Otsu)
The “Legend Of Dinosaurs” directed by Junji Kurata
The “Legend Of Dinosaurs” music by Masao Yagi

MST3K Guest Cast: none

The “Legend Of Dinosaurs” Cast: Tsunehiko Watase, Nobiko Sawa, Shotako Hayashi, Tomoko Kiyoshima, Fuyukichi Maki, David Freedman, Maureen Peacock, Catharine Laub, Hiroshi Nawa, Ginji Nakamura (as Kinji Nakamura), Masataka Iwao, Goro Oki, Yusuke Tsukasa, Yukio Miyagi, Akira Moroguchi, Tetsuo Fujisawa, Mineko Maruhira, Satoru Nabe, Takashi Noguchi, Toshio Tomogane, Yoshiaki Yamashita

LogBook entry by Philip R. Frey Continue reading

Star Trek V: The Final Frontier

Star Trek MoviesStardate 8454.1: On the planet Nimbus III, a central location where one ambassador each from the Federation, Klingon Empire and Romulan Empire have met to discuss solutions to the mutual hostility each government holds for the others, talks have virtually ceased despite the arrival of a new Romulan ambassador and Nimbus III has become an arid desert. A renegade Vulcan – apparently breaking from the tradition of his race and embracing emotions and impulses – has generated a strong following on the planet and takes the three ambassadors hostage. The Vulcan, Sybok, then sends a message to the delegates’ governments, demanding a fair hearing of his demands in exchange for the hostages’ lives. A Klingon vessel, commanded by trigger-happy Captain Klaa, heads for Nimbus III with Klaa spoiling for a fight with the legendary Enterprise.

The Enterprise arrives first, and Kirk mounts a rescue operation involving distracting the guards, but he finds himself being held at gunpoint by the hostages he was meant to rescue, Kirk realizes that the affair has been a trap. Sybok now intends to hijack the Enterprise, and succeeds in earning the loyalty of Sulu, Uhura and Chekov by “releasing” them from painful memories in their lives. Sybok sets the Enterprise on a course to the Great Barrier at the center of the galaxy, where he believes he will find the mythical planet Sha Ka Ree and, according to Sybok’s theory, that world’s inhabitant – God. Surviving the supposedly deadly trip through the barrier, the Enterprise arrives at an uncharted planet, convincing many of the ship’s crew that Sybok may be right. In their excitement, no one notices that Klaa’s ship is now arriving at Sha Ka Ree as well.

Kirk, Spock, McCoy and Sybok fly a shuttle to the surface and, although initially finding no sign of life, encounter the projection of an enormous face which claims to be God and greets Sybok. However, when the being insists that the Enterprise be brought in close enough that he may meld with it for the journey beyond the Great Barrier, Kirk is suspicious and questions the being’s authenticity. The creature lashes out at Kirk and Spock when they doubt his identity, and Sybok realizes that it is not God. Grappling with the entity so that the others may escape, Sybok gives Kirk time to order a torpedo fired at the creature, but it is not easily killed. When they return to the shuttle, Kirk, Spock and McCoy discover that it has been crippled by the creature, and Kirk orders Scotty to beam Spock and McCoy up.

As soon as they have safely returned to the Enterprise, Klaa opens fire on the Enterprise, damaging the transporters once more. Spock convinces General Koord, the Klingon delegate from Nimbus III and one of Sybok’s recent converts, to use his rank to commandeer Klaa’s ship and rescue Kirk. Koord agrees, and Spock takes over the gunner’s seat on the Klingon ship to destroy the God impostor in time to save Kirk. The Klingons and the Enterprise leave Sha Ka Ree peacefully (and after profuse apologies from Klaa), offering some hope for a peaceful future, in which the formerly disgruntled Nimbus III delegates promise to take a more active interest.

Order this movie on DVDDownload this episode via Amazon's Unboxscreenplay by David Loughery
story by William Shatner, Harve Bennett and David Loughery
directed by William Shatner
music by Jerry Goldsmith

Cast: William Shatner (Captain Kirk), Leonard Nimoy (Spock), DeForest Kelley (Dr. McCoy), James Doohan (Scotty), Walter Koenig (Chekov), Nichelle Nichols (Uhura), George Takei (Sulu), David Warner (St. John Talbot), Laurence Luckinbill (Sybok), Charles Cooper (Korrd), Cynthia Guow (Caithlin Dar), Todd Bryant (Captain Klaa), Spice Williams (Vixis), Rex Holman (J’onn), George Murdock (“God”), Jonathan Simpson (Young Sarek), Beverly Hart (Vulcan High Priestess), Steve Susskind (Pitchman), Harve Bennett (Starfleet Chief of Staff), Cynthia Blaise (Young Amanda), Bill Quinn (McCoy’s Father), Melanie Shatner (Yeoman)

Note: Although the movie’s end seemed to touch on a Federation peace with the Klingons, the situation obviously was a small instance of cooperation between the two, as Star Trek VI indicated that they were still deadly enemies. David Warner would return to Star Trek VI, though in a drastically different role, as well as a later appearance in a two-part episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation. Charles Cooper would also resurface in Next Generation, again as a Klingon, but minus the belching, as would George Murdock, appearing as Admiral Hansen in the fan-favorite story Best Of Both Worlds. Rex Holman appeared in the original series Spectre Of The Gun.

LogBook entry by Earl Green

Manhunt

Star Trek: The Next GenerationStardate 42859.2: The Enterprise crew welcomes some fishlike Antedian delegates to a peace summit and, on short notice, Troi’s bothersome mother. Mrs. Troi, now in a phase of increased sexual activity, has come to the Enterprise to “visit” Picard, which meets with disapproval from Counselor Troi and amusement from Riker – while the captain hides in the holodeck generated world of Dixon Hill once more.

Order the DVDswritten by Terry Devereaux (a.k.a. Tracy Tormè)
directed by Rob Bowman
music by Dennis McCarthy

Guest Cast: Diana Muldaur (Dr. Pulaski), Majel Barrett (Lwaxana Troi), Robert Costanzo (Slade Bender), Carel Struycken (Mr. Homn), Rod Arrants (Rex), Colm Meaney (Chief O’Brien), Robert O’Reilly (Client), Rhonda Aldrich (Madeline), Mick Fleetwood (Antedian Delegate), Wren T. Brown (Transport Pilot)

Notes: Tracy Tormè used a pseudonym for this episode and The Royale, having since stated this his original scripts for both episodes were rewritten against his wishes.

LogBook entry by Earl Green

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